I used to hate Sunday when I was a child because we weren’t allowed to do anything. The Lord’s Day you know, and although he abhors sloth, he demands it one day of the week. I bet there are some tricks to getting around the six other deadly sins too, but that seems like a post for another day. I had a wonderful time last night and you can read the family friendly version on my other blog. The outfit I wore was working for me because my husband never even let me go to the bathroom without trailing after me. There were two great looking guys right behind us both wearing cowboy hats, which I found tres amusant. The most interesting event of the evening was that my husband finally noticed I wasn’t wearing a wedding ring. If you’ve been following this melodrama you know I took it off early in September, five freaking months ago. I put it in the box on my dresser where it has sat alone, shinning like a searchlight ever since. He asked me where it was, took it out of the box as soon as we got home, and put it back in place. I kept looking at the chain design this morning and I found it so distracting that I took it off again. It’s just a symbol of course, but so is a flag, a swastika, and an extended middle finger.
When our first child was born the hospital staff told me I had to take the ring off and I refused. They put tape over it and made me sign a release form saying I would hold them harmless if it were lost. I remember the action, but I cannot capture the feeling that made me stubbornly decline to be parted with the little chain around my finger. I know everyone is tired of hearing about it, and I’m actually tired of talking about it, but there it sits. Indecision is not a place where I feel at home, but no matter how many times I pack my bags in my mind, I don’t seem to get further than a hotel room. I know certain people would be more than happy if I would just talk about that and quit whining, but I suppose I think too much. One thing I’m thinking is that he didn’t ask me why I took it off. Anyone want to take a bet on how long it will take him to notice this time?
As a former journalist, I cannot imagine anyone being so unobservant. It took him five months to notice the "what" and then he doesn't bother with the "why" and is maybe torturing himself with the "who," "when," "where" and--especially--the "how."
ReplyDeleteNormally, I decry the fickle nature of woman but here you've met you're match. This guy is outstanding. I think you should keep him around for entertainment value.
He does take unobservant to a whole new level. I actually figured he wouldn't notice for some time, but 5 months is long even for him. You must know by now that fickle is not a word people use in the same sentence with my name. Any other woman would have left years ago. I blamed myself, and to some extent I still do. I didn't make the demands I should have. The entertainment value is also a factor, but not as funny as you would think after a time. I doubt that the other "w" words or the how have entered his mind as of yet.
ReplyDeleteI'll bet it doesn't take him 5 months this time... maybe he'll get it the next time you go out and someone hits on you.
ReplyDeleteI'm not tired of hearing about it. I'm excited and sad and hopeful and worried for you all at once.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your concern and comments. I do always want life to be simpler, but somehow I doubt it's ever gonna be that way again. He actually stopped by the bedroom last night, pulled my hand out from under the covers to check on the ring. Still no why. I'll tell more later, but I have to get to work.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting. Maybe he doesn't need to ask why and can see that it's one more step toward your independence, whether you choose to stay or go. An independent, strong woman scares the shit out of most men... as it should.
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite lines from a song..."You don't like weak women cause you get bored so quick, and you don't like strong women cause they're hip to your tricks"...
ReplyDeleteHe's trying really hard. I have started several posts, just no time to finish. I'm off Friday and will fill everyone in on the continuing story.
If you want to stay (and that might be a huge if), then it sounds like you'll need to start the conversation. And, given his clear neediness, now is probably the time to do it.
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