ARGH!

When he first started calling me I have to admit I was flattered, an important busy man like that taking the time to call little old me. Although some might say I am not inclined to make snap judgements about people, they would be wrong. With a few exceptions, if I don't like someone two minutes into a conversation I'm never going to feel any more predisposed to them later. This man I liked immediately. His voice was so rich and confident, and his words held wonderful promises of the future we would build together. How could I resist? 

This afternoon however when I heard the now familiar voice for the third time today I felt the tension building behind my eyes. Then I did something remarkable. I hung up the phone. When I sat down at my computer the emails began.  Heartlessly I deleted them unread just like the dozens of others I received today and every day this month. I am writing this to let him know that it's nothing personal but it simply has to stop. Now don't think this means we can't be friends, because I've already voted for you, but for pity sakes Barack, it's embarrassing.  Oh, and you're not fooling anyone having your wife or one of your minions call either. It ends here. Tomorrow morning I'll just go back to my ordinary life and you go on and run the country, okay?